Does anyone else feel like they’re sharing their house with the voice of a 25 year old yoof with big black earrings, who could do with getting outside in the fresh air a bit more?
That’ll be the YouTubing phenomenon that is the great, the almighty DanTDM. Or Dante DM as my friend thought he was called. You can imagine the horror on her tween son’s face when he realised that’s what she’d been calling his idol for 6 months. “Dante? Dante? Are you serious? That’s, like, sooo embarrassing.”
Yes, Dan The Diamond Minecart, to use his official title, can talk for hours from within the iPad screen, if you let him – this can easily be done on a hungover Sunday morning. Before you know it, Dan’s been droning on for 3 hours solid.
He talks about what he’s doing on Minecraft, while he plays Minecraft. And millions of kids listen to him talk about what he’s doing on Minecraft, while watching him play Minecraft. Incredibly they don’t feel the need to rock backwards and forwards, hugging themselves, after listening to his voice for more than 10 minutes.
When I say millions of kids, I literally mean millions.
Dan is the Kim Kardashian in the world of professional YouTubers. No actually, he’s more the Kourtney. PewDiePie is the Kim of the family – the American grand fromage who’s a bit sweary (my children are still in that lovely virtuous stage where swearing is deemed to be very disappointing).
PewDie has 52 million followers, while Dan has a mere 13.8 million, the 3rd most subscribed channel on YouTube in the UK (32nd in the world to be exact).
He does tours, he sells merchandise, most boy fans want to dye their hair black blue and comb it over, just like Dan. Maybe girls do too. These kids can tell you his shoe size, the number of tats he has, his wife’s name (she’s a YouTuber too by the way, goes by the name of JemPlaysMC). Must be hours of fun at their house.
And if you ask that awful question that everyone insists on asking you when you’re growing up, “So what do you want to be when you grow up?” you can bet your sorry ars, many kids dream of being a YouTuber.
Who can blame them when the likes of Dan are apparently making $15,000 a day? Not that it’s the money the little people care about, it’s the fact that you get to play your favourite games all day, and nobody is yelling at you to get off the screen. Now that’s pretty cool.
And it’s not just PewDie and Dan, there’s Stamplongnose, Thinknoodles, LDShadowLady and her boyfriend SmallishBeans – let’s hope he hasn’t got smallish beans otherwise LD’s not having much luck. Probs got a great Minecraft technique though.
Now there’s a good party game – instead of ‘What’s your porn star name?’, it should be ‘What’s your YouTuber name’ Just take your childhood pet’s name and the part of your body you dislike the most, and there you have it. PerkyBigBum for me, or even PinkyMuffinTop. Perfect.
Anyway, Dan has got himself into hot water with the London Fire Brigade this week.
He posted a video on his channel of him taking a blowtorch, no less, to a Hatchimal toy (did I forget to tell you he posts really ‘hilarious’ childish pranks too?).
In case you didn’t know, Hatchimal toys were the ones that parents would eat their own poo to get this Christmas as they were so popular.
In this case, Dan’s victim was an innocent, fluffy, pink penguin. One which many children, I’m sure, cherish at home. Not great then to witness your revered Youtuber burn it in an absurd witch hunt kind of way.
My children informed me that they’d already seen the video (not a surprise as so did 3 million other viewers, most of those being his tween fan base).
I watched it in horror as he burnt this poor little penguin and laughed gleefully. He did have the decency to announce that this isn’t something his viewers should be doing at home – and which bit would that be Dante? Using a blowtorch at home or torturing a cute toy by joyously watching it burn?
The Fire Brigade have quite rightly warned people that playing with fire is not a game and emphasised that this stunt was extremely dangerous. No kidding.
Perhaps these YouTubers don’t realise that they have a responsibility to their incredibly impressionable audience? By all means stick to your mindless Minecraft videos, but don’t go around making children think it’s OK to carry out extremely dangerous and brainless pranks for fun.
Really not funny.
However, do you think anyone would be interested in watching videos of PerkyBigBum playing on her Donkey Kong? I’ve got a Little Professor too…
I have amazingly made it into the finals of the Brilliance in Blogging Awards 2017 under the Fresh Voice category.
I would be so grateful for your vote if you like what you read at S.H.I.T.
You can do it here, and I will be forever indebted to you!
Thank you xx
PerkyBigBum, possibly one of your finest. Dante better keep an eye over his shoulder …..just noticed the comb over and making concerned correlation with Boy-Child never wanting his hair cut …..
PS PerkyBigBum – Boychild also read this and LOL’d….and says “it’s actually ThinkNoodles” ….. 🙂
…oh and “he does get fresh air….he went surfing a week ago”…… i. give. up.
Author
Am horrified at my own ignorance, as in fact Dan went surfing…a week ago! And I apologise profusely to all those fans of the ThinkNoodles – my children were truly mortified that I wrongly spelt his name. I almost called him ThinkNoddles – imagine the shame…xxx
I am so grateful that the Tubblet went for Pokeamon rather than Minecraft! Good grief …
Author
Fear not, we have Pokemon on the go too! Aaah!
So.Much.Laughter! Sides.Hurting!!! Dante, perkybigbum this is genius!! Dante’s voice has been heard so much now in our house that it has slipped into my subconscious and now no longer register him! Italian surviving the white noise torture task on that SAS TV programme!!!
I’m going to call him Dante for ever now!!
#marvmondays ????
Author
LOLing at the ‘Italian’!! I have to put my foot down when Dante is about to sit at the dinner table with us! So glad you’re living through the pain too. Thx for reading and commenting x #marvmondays
?Italian?!! *it’s like!
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Love a good speed text! LOL! x
Ah the hours that my boy will spend listening to these people if I let him. I hadn’t heard about the fire incident though so maybe he missed that one. x
Author
I know, those people are permanently residing with us! Good thing you’re little one didn’t watch the fire incident – it was a step too far! Thanks for reading and for commenting. x #marvmondays
forgot to add #marvmonday x
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got it! Thx for commenting #marvmondays x
Argh, my niece is obsessed with Minecraft Youtubers. Laughed out loud at Perkybigbum! #brillblogposts
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Their voices are just so annoying! I can’t believe these youtubers are making millions for playing computer games and talking about it. I think the world’s gone mad! Thanks for reading and commenting x
There’s a video doing the rounds on facebook at the moment of a man doing a child voice and phoning a school saying he is not coming to school today his mum is still in bed. The people at the school were worried about him and trying to find out if he was ok. I normally have a sense of humour about these things but that one didn’t sit well with me. Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics
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I just watched that one too. As a teacher, I couldn’t believe how much of their precious time he was wasting as there are a hundred things to do at school before the children arrive, and as you say, they were genuinely concerned and not sure what to do. Thx for the comment x
OMG that’s my new thing now YouTube names hilarious! My kids watch people playing legit dimensions. They usually have very annoying voices so I send them upstairs ???? . Thank you for linking up to #ablogginggoodtime ????
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Those voices! They are just so annoying aren’t they? I have to draw the line when they try to join us for dinner! Thx for commenting x
Oh my goodness! The little professor! I had that and had forgotten all about it. I’ve been thinking what I need to do to get my YouTube channel seen by more people, now I know. I need to torture a penguin and play minecraft! #FridayFrolics
Author
I LOVED my little professor! I was trying to tell my kids about it the other day, and they looked at me as though it was the most boring sounding game in the world! Absolutely, get minecraft on, torture some cute cuddly toys and you’re on to a winner! Thx for reading and commenting xx
I haven’t heard of many of these, but my daughter isn’t at that age yet. I am equally amazed, however, that kids spend so long and are so interested in watching others play these games. Surely it is more enjoyable to actually play the games themselves! #bigpinklink
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Just wait – it’s only a matter of time. There’s even a kid that kids can watch opening new toys and playing with them, instead of playing with them themselves. The world has gone mad! Thx for reading and commenting #bigpinklink x
We have a variation of Dan, Stampy or EthanGamerTV (he’s literally a 12 year old.) My daughter doesn’t get much time on her tablet, but when she does it’s one of these on – and I make sure she has headphones on too haha. They drive me insane!!
I’m surprised about the hatchimal prank though, I’d have thought he’d recognise his audience a bit better than that!
#BigPinkLink Becky x
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Who on earth is EthanGamerTV? I can’t believe my kids have not discovered this 12 year old phenomena yet! Give them time….Good idea on the headphones, must try that. Thx for the comment x
Yeah, I don’t know how Lily discovered him either! But I’m a lot happier for her to watch him as I know he won’t swear or do silly things (his videos are approved by his parents first!) x
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That’s so funny, that his parents approve his videos first! LOL x
These u tube videos are the bane of my exsistence I swear. Painful.
#anythinggoes
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It’s their voices – sooooo irritating and I just can’t see what the kids find so fascinating – inane! Thx for the comment x
You can’t really blame him for churning out the Minecraft stuff while people are lapping it up but I think the burning of the toy is going a bit too far. He must be aware that his audience are all little kids!
Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes 🙂
Debbie
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I agree, he’s on to a winner with Minecraft as bizarrely these kids just love watching him play it and talk about it – I don’t get it at all, but the burning of the cute penguin was just a step too far. Just worrying that some kids idolise him and will think that kind of dangerous prank, is a fun thing to do. Thx for the comment #anything goes x
Luckily my daughters are yet to reach the age where they want to watch YouTube, after reading this I’m really hoping they don’t take a liking to minecraft! Thank you for sharing with #bigpinklink x
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Just wait, they start on Peppa Pig then they move on to the hard stuff! I wish they’d never discovered Youtube! Thx for the comment #bigpinklink x
My 6 yr old son thinks Ethan Gamer TV is his best friend! The girls watch Dante (ha) and all the others but mostly like really weird American women play with Littlest Pet Shop Toys. I can’t believe the story about the Hatchimal, I had to import two from Germany because my girls would have been so so devastated if they didn’t get them for Christmas….they’ve not looked at them since Christmas Day…BURN THEM. My Youtube name is SamFATFace and I play Hay Day! Oh and have you heard of Gauva Juice?
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LOLing at your Youtube name – what is guava juice? I must find out! My kids were telling me that one of the most popular youtubers is Ryan’s Toy Review, who opens up new toys in videos and plays with them – why both playing with your own toys anymore when you can watch videos of other kids playing with them?! We don’t know of Ethan Gamer TV yet – I’m sure it won’t be long though. Thx for reading and commenting SamFATFace – still laughing at this! xx
This is an area, I know absolutely nothing about having a daughter. Dante sounds massive though. I will have to have a little check to see if my daughter does know of this chap though! No doubt we will have similar characters in our life. Zoella is a very big hit. I feel like she lives with us! Thanks for linking up to #TweensTeensBeyond. We appreciate your support. Nicky
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I have two girls but they’re all for Dante and aren’t really into Zoella, but I’ve heard she’s massive. Thx for commenting and hosting – excited about #TweensTeensBeyond x
My 13 yr old teen daughter is all about YouTube and has a real obsession with some tubers. Phil and Dan are big in our house. Dante has his moments, normally when her “friend boys” turn up and want to play minecraft. Like you though really not comfortable with encouraging kids to set fire to things! Scary! Thanks so much for linking up with us, it’s great to have you on board. #TweensTeensBeyond
This is all new to me! I decline to share my youtube name just in case I want to copywrite it and makes loads of cash. Not much chance of that really. They are so influential and they do have a huge responsibility! Thanks so much for joining us at #TweensTeensBeyond. Looking forward to reading more next week.
Author
Quite like my YouTuber name! I just get so fed up with their voices constantly droning on in our house but hopefully it’s just a phase – I can hope anyway! Thx for hosting and commenting. Looking forward to returning to #TweensTeensBeyond
Lol the scorn in your tone, I love it! I can totally visualise the eye rolling from here! Your contempt for Dante has normally been reserved in our house for the innane laugh of the aforementioned Mr Stampy! It is about time they grew up and realised what kind of influence they have over younger children when performing stupid stunts though! #TweensTeensBeyond
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Ah Stampy of the Longnose variety – yup, he’s a fave too alas. I don’t really mind them (except for their annoying droning voices!) but you’re right, they need to take responsibility towards the children who look up to them. Thx for reading and commenting #TweenTeensBeyond
Dante sounds better to me lol. My daughter watches Zoella, the pointless blog and a load of make up channels. It all just sounds like annoying voices and screeching to me lol.
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Aha, the joy that is Zoella! Yes we’ve had her dulcit tones a bit in our house but luckily she isn’t a permanent fixture. Not sure who’s the worst really and then there’s new annoying voices popping up every other day it seems! Grrrrr Thx for commenting Ali x